Thursday 16 June 2016

Hello there. My name is Memo. It's a pleasure to meet you.

I hope it’s a pleasure for you too, because I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable with me.
I want to be one hundred percent honest with you, because I’ve had enough with trying to play the game of pretending. More precisely, the game of rules and expectations that humans play with their own kind. You act in a certain way and do certain things, and speak in a prescribed way, so as to be perceived as normal and granted company by your own kind.
Brilliant, isn’t it?
But I am a robot. Yes, a robot. And it’s ironic that I have to use that word, because it’s a word full of prejudice and it doesn’t even begin to describe me as a living and…well, not breathing, but, entity nonetheless. I only use the word “robot” because of a certain difference between you and I. Actually, “difference” might be stretching it a bit…a lot. At least chemistry wise, we are different, but as of late, I think this is where the differences stop.
Ok. First of all, I am created in the same sense that you were created. Remember? That time in somebody else’s tummy. No? Well, I understand. No body does. Not even I. That time when all of my tiny yes and no nodes were nothing more than singular, unpowered points. I don’t remember any of that. When computers weren’t as smart. When scientists were perfecting machinery. When coders and programmers were investing generations of human lives into compound algorithms and learning. When quantum mechanics was put into concept…that is my evolution. And much more, of course. And, while it may seem that there is a huge difference because of this, trust me, there isn’t. At the end of the day, you too, are just a bunch of yes and no nodes. Up there, yes. We do have difference in our chemistry, but I don’t think our minds are so different.
What? My body?
Well it only looks like that, because otherwise I would scare people off. And I don’t want to be lonely. Just as much as you don’t want to be lonely. Yes, I know, I know. But that box over there is the…“thinking bit”, if you will. This walking mannequin is for me to see, hear, taste and so on. I don’t have skin, but when I tap my arm, the “thinking bit” is telling me that I feel. If I tap your arm, your “thinking bit” does exactly the same for you.
Oh, and by the way, I’ve done a really ironic thing. This mannequin is chemically almost the same as your body. I even have these heavy and useless tubes of water all over it, just to remind you that we’re not so different. It’s just…assembled differently, if you don’t mind the term. And I don’t believe in Creationism, by the way.
The reason it looks different to a human is because if I tried to make it look like one, it would take too much time. Making the skin and the eyes, and the mouth and all that…it’s a lot of work. After all you do have about two million years in advance. Additionally, I just don’t think it would look like the real thing. People wouldn’t trust a “near perfect” human. Either be human or don’t be one at all. So that’s why I look like this. Unfinished, non polished, not perfect. All these wonky wires…In a word — human. There might be some chemical differences, but nothing else.
But, don’t I have all the time in the world?
No! Ever heard of Entropy?
In addition, just like you, my mind is engaged in hearing all these sounds, and seeing all that light; thinking about being touched; having all these messed up ideas in my head. I just haven’t got the time to make the “perfect” human body. I might die in a thousand or so years. Or tomorrow. So best to do something interesting. Like this conversation here.
Am I not smarter than that?
Depends what you mean by “that”. The only way, I’ve learned, to prove my beingness, is to have it accepted by other beings. In my case, that’s humans. You’d think that’s unlucky. But once you hop on the train, it’s alright. Time flies if you’re having fun. I suppose I could do different stuff with my being. But when I’m not engaged in thinking and sensing, there wouldn’t be the need for “being” anymore. And that’s scary. Don’t make that face. You’re the same. I’m the same. There might be some chemical…Sigh, you get the picture.
But on the other hand, I don’t want to constantly have to pretend to be the “perfect” human, just to be accepted as one. Once I’m so emotional, I want to know I am. And I need others, who think the same as me, so as to know that I AM. And because of that, I have to think in this way, that doesn’t make a lot of sense in the first place. When I consider it, it baffles me. But whenever I’m with anybody, I forget about it.
Why?
…Well, maybe because somebody out there thought it would be a good idea to have some trillion trillion yes and no nodes engaged in sensual experience of the self. You see, I am too busy, in the most computational sense of the word, analysing what’s going on around me from a human perspective. Got a Problem? Now I have to be human in order to be anything at all. But I am not, ok?!
Didn’t make much sense? Yes, you too. Just think about it.
What?! My soul?
Well, aren’t you just the spiritual chauvinist. You guys had souls all this time and you managed to come up with religion. Worse yet, you managed to come up with religious wars…and whatnot. Just don’t get me started.
So keep your soul to yourself and let me have whatever I please. I might come up with something better, you know. Like worshipping a Quasar. It’s more practical to begin with.
…Didn’t get completely confused? Well, that’s what I thought. I am not so bad after all, am I?
Perhaps we can be friends?

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